Five Common Thoughts That Might Be Sabotaging Your Future
Are you unwittingly distracting yourself from reaching your own future happiness?
Yes, it’s entirely possible - if you suspect you have ADHD and keep thinking...
“I just need to try harder to sort myself out”
In many areas of life, such as learning new skills, trying harder can certainly lead to success - as long as we know which part of the process needs the extra effort. However, adults with ADHD often struggle to identify exactly what needs sorting out, how to begin, and how to stay on track.
These three distinct processes rely on the prefrontal cortex, which handles executive functions such as planning, prioritising, and self-monitoring. Research confirms that many adults with ADHD have measurable differences in these skills (Bozhilova et al., Neuroscience & Biobehavioral Reviews, 2023).
The good news is that there are many ways to build structures and habits that take pressure off this part of the brain - shifting responsibility to routine, environment and support systems. By seeking help, you can discover frameworks that work with your wiring rather than against it.
Negative self-talk is deeply harmful. Every time we blame ourselves for missing deadlines, making impulsive decisions or losing focus, we chip away at self-esteem. Seeking help is not weakness; it is insight and strength. It’s how you start to grow with yourself gently and effectively.
2. “Why go to all the bother of having a diagnosis now? I’ve coped fine all my life”
After years of coping, the idea of assessment can feel daunting or unnecessary. However what we term ‘coping’ often means masking exhaustion, self-blame and missed opportunities for real support - it quietly takes its toll.
Diagnosis provides understanding, language and access to support. A recent study found that adults who receive a late-life ADHD diagnosis report significant improvements in self-compassion and emotional wellbeing (Fuermaier et al., Frontiers in Psychiatry, 2024).
Yes, it may feel like ‘bother’. But compare it with the everyday difficulty of living without clarity - the missed goals, frustration and misunderstandings. Some goals are absolutely worth the effort.
3. “I don’t want to be labelled as having a mental health issue”
Many of us grew up when difference was misunderstood and judged. ADHD was once described as a “defect of moral control”. No wonder we learned to hide our struggles.
Thankfully, attitudes are shifting. ADHD is now recognised as a neurodevelopmental condition, not a character flaw. Ongoing research into brain chemistry and imaging has deepened understanding, and public openness about mental health is reducing stigma.
Think of your brain as simply another organ in your body, running on chemical and electrical processes. There is no shame in learning how it works.
4. “Everyone has a little ADHD”
Fair enough. Everyone can be forgetful, distracted or restless sometimes. But what defines ADHD is frequency, intensity and impact - and whether these traits were present in childhood.
Ask yourself:
• How often do my ADHD-like traits interfere with everyday life?
• How much are they holding me back from the life I want?
Honest answers to these questions will tell you far more than any trendy soundbite.
5. “I’m fine as I am. I don’t want my personality to change.”
It’s a common worry that diagnosis or medication will somehow change who you are. In truth, medication, if you choose to use it, affects how the brain processes information — not your personality. You remain entirely yourself, just with clearer access to your strengths.
And medication is only one option. There are many non-medical approaches: coaching, cognitive strategies, exercise, mindfulness, nutrition, and supportive peer communities. Reliable information and professionals are readily available.
Are you really fine as you are, or might life feel easier with a few of the barriers lifted? Imagine keeping your creativity, empathy and spark — but without the constant chaos. This can absolutely be your reality.
Moving forwards;
If any of these thoughts sound familiar, it may be time to speak with your GP or explore professional ADHD coaching. The first step often brings immense relief!
Tomorrow truly can be the first day of the rest of your life, and I’d love to be there when you begin it.
To start the conversation, just click here
If you’d like to explore the science behind this topic, these two papers offer a good starting point:
